Compostable Reusable Applications Platform (Crap)

This was inspired by a colleague who came back from Gartner Symposium a couple of years ago and said “Gar you would have loved it Compostable Architecture you put crap in and you get crap out”. If you are reading this I’m assuming you know this was a play on words for Composable Architecture Gartner was holding out as the nextThis resulted in me spending way too much time (not as much as pre-LLM) thinking about this and our now accelerated ability to create more sh!t faster. Welcome to my new Compostable Reusable Applications Platform or CRAP architecture framework it is organic but it’s entirely unsustainable. Enjoy but please don’t take this too seriously. LLM generated content now feels like micro-plastics, they are everywhere, in everything and virtually undetectable.

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Introducing a groundbreaking, earth-shattering architecture method in the world of software architecture:

Compostable Reusable Application Platforms (CRAP)

CRAP takes the concept of software development and turns it into a gardening adventure.

Core Principles of CRAP:

Organic Growth: Much like a compost pile, your software should grow organically, layer by layer, with the occasional coffee ground and eggshell thrown in for good measure. Embrace the chaos; who knows what kind of mushrooms will sprout overnight?

Recycle Everything: Did someone say legacy code? In the world of CRAP, nothing goes to waste. That snippet from 1999? It’s not outdated; it’s vintage, adding character and a lovely aroma of nostalgia to your application.

Decomposition is Key: Just as compost decomposes to enrich the soil, allow parts of your software to gracefully decay. Not only does it provide nutrients to newer modules, but it also creates job security as you’ll always have something to fix.

Worms Are Welcome: Bugs aren’t just expected; they’re encouraged! In CRAP, bugs are like worms in compost: they aerate the system and speed up decomposition. The more, the merrier (and the muddier).

Seasonal Adjustments: Just as a garden changes with the seasons, so too should your application. Winter is coming? Time to introduce that new module you’ve been chilling. Spring has sprung? Let’s blossom some features!

Harvest Time: Eventually, it’s time to reap what you sow. This usually aligns with the annual company review, where you can present the fruits of your labour, carefully avoiding any mention of the compost heap it grew from.

Implementation of CRAP:

To implement CRAP, one must adopt a mindset of joyful cynicism, a willingness to get their hands dirty, and an acceptance that, at the end of the day, we’re all just shoveling… compost. From agile methodologies to waterfall, all processes can be adapted to fit CRAP’s flexible, odoriferous nature.

The Promise of CRAP:

CRAP promises a sustainable, green(ish) approach to software development. By embracing the cycles of growth, decay, and rebirth, CRAP ensures that your application remains as dynamic and evolving as the world around it. Plus, it’s guaranteed to generate buzz (and flies) in the office, fostering a lively (and slightly pungent) atmosphere of creativity and innovation.

Remember, in the world of CRAP, every day is Earth Day, and every code commit is a step toward a more compostable, sustainable future. So grab your shovel, don your gardening gloves, and let’s turn today’s software development practices into tomorrow’s fertiliser!