Is AI the End of Dating Apps?

In recent years, the novelty of dating apps has given way to burnout and frustration. Falling revenue suggests that people are looking for alternatives, leading to speculation that dating apps may have reached their peak. The industry, it would seem, is in need of a refresh: Enter AI.

It turns out that for some, AI is the wingperson they did not know they needed. According to Match and The Kinsey Institute's latest Singles in America report that was released this month, 26% of adults in the U.S. – and 49% of Gen Z – have turned to AI for dating help. This help can come in a variety of forms; people are using AI to select attractive photos, write clever bios, craft flirtatious opening lines, and even analyze conversations to gauge romantic interest.

If you think using AI for dating sounds like an exercise in disingenuity, your potential match may disagree. Consider the following: In a recent study, we conducted an experiment where we randomly assigned participants to write a date request message: (1) on their own, (2) using AI, or (3) by modifying a message that AI had written for them. Then, we had both the participants and a panel of external judges rate the messages for effectiveness. We found that participants’ ratings did not vary by source, but that external judges rated the AI messages as more effective than the human ones.

A reasonable person may argue that using AI to write a date request message is not all that different from turning to a friend for help. In the play Cyrano de Bergerac, Cyrano writes love letters to Roxanne for his co-conspirator Christian to pass off as his own. In much the same way, AI can express what humans might sometimes struggle to articulate. We term this the Cyrano effect.

But what happens if AI starts to overtake dating apps? The illusion that Christian created in Cyrano de Bergerac came crashing down when he started spending more time with Roxanne in person. On dating apps, people already worry about being lied to or catfished. AI could make deception even tougher to spot – if not impossible. Most people who use AI for dating probably are not disclosing it to potential partners.

The most compelling vision of the future is not one that replaces humans with AI boyfriends and girlfriends but that uses AI to form and sustain authentic human connections. Dating apps are uniquely positioned to do that by automating the tedious parts of dating so people can focus on getting to know each other.

We have known for some time that dating app algorithms are imperfect, leading to endless swiping, awkward conversations, and dead-end first dates. AI-driven matchmaking could fix that by learning to recognize true compatibility. But the potential for misrepresentation may give people more reason to meet face-to-face. Paradoxically, advances in AI could be the change we need by ushering in a return to traditional dating.

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